So far I have been lucky. I've not been very sick, just a little nauseous. My belly is getting big, and I am just unpatiently waiting for February 22 to come so I can hear my baby's heartbeat. I was thinking of a nickname for the baby, since I don't know whether it is a boy or girl yet, haven't came up with anything, but I will keep you posted.
Sleep has been becoming very uncomfortable now...I am always tossing and turning, and never comfortable. I guess this is because I like sleeping on my stomach more so than my side. I've been worn out, can't do as much as I used to it gets too tiring. Wonder what it's going to be like when I get further along.
Waiting till March until I find a new place, but currently I had to move in with my mom. The place I am looking at is real nice, and with my friends we will be able to handle, and our kids will be friends! The only thing is...I am tired of moving. So if anything I will probably stay in the apartment complex after the lease is up, it is truely beautiful.
B asked me if I was ready to be a mom...the answer...no. Nobody's ready really unless they planned the pregnancy or until the baby's born. I know when the time comes, I will be ready. He asked me about adoption. I about cracked. I can't imagine giving my baby away. Hats off to those who can, but I wouldn't be able to live with myself. I know I will struggle, but this is my baby and I am going to take care of it. There have been many people in my family, and people I know that have had babies out of wedlock and or who have been a single parent and they made it through...grandma had 7 kids to take care of and she managed. And although B said he was going to be there...I won't believe it til I see it.
All in all I guess my biggest fear is being a single mom...I didn't want that for my baby. I wanted to have a husband, for my baby to have a dad right there all the time, but things don't go as we expect or plan them to. Maybe one day I will find a guy who will marry me, and my child will have a dad there, and I will have someone to walk with me through this journey.
Just blessed right now to have the family and friends in my life that I do.
